Monday 27 October 2008

If it walks like a duck....

You know the phrase "if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck" etc? Sometimes things can be totally bleeding obvious to everyone else but not to you. (Hmmm, is that denial?)

Just worked out why I have been having migraines for the past couple of weeks. I'm pregnant. Now, everything makes perfect sense. I should've known really as had last migraine whilst pregnant with DT and absolutely none since. Plus, I have been completely knackered for the past couple of weeks; I just put that down to a cold/starting new job/going to gym (which I have just signed up for a whole year with, wonderful!)

When I told my friend Sal she just smiled and said "thought so!". What a fantastic doctor I am. Although must say, in my own defence that I was taking the little pills so wasn't entirely expecting it!

Myself and Mr O are quite pleased, if still a little shell-shocked....

Thursday 23 October 2008

Credit crunch....

When I am not trick cycling or chasing around after the Duracell Toddler, I have another role - that of bookkeeper for my husband's business. Now unfortunately, when we decided to set up the business at the end of last year there wasn't a credit crunch....and until a couple of months ago it was all going rather well. Then the bank decided to increase the rates on the small business loan it has given us and the much larger companies which owe us money have started to take longer and longer to pay us. Not good. Now instead of waiting nearly 60 days for payment from them (they are supposed to pay us within 30) it is now becoming 90 days plus. In order to pay our staff this means that all of our accounts including our personal ones are now fully overdrawn and I am now having to use my savings which weren't huge in the first place. Just read in the Times that the amount of small businesses going under has increased from 40 to 280 a week and on average they are owed £30,000 by larger businesses. Now that the government have bailed out the banks there is a clause that they are supposed to reinvest in small businesses - but apparently our local bank manager doesn't know anything about it and they're not willing to be flexible with us! Bastards....

A couple of months ago I was really enjoying being part of the business and was even thinking that if I went part-time I might become more involved in it or even set up my own enterprise. Frightening how unstable everything is when you start going into recession. Ah well, at least I have a reasonably stable job at the moment, although I think my chance of going part-time in the near future is lessening rapidly!

On a cheerier note at least fuel prices are coming down and I am spending less money on things we don't really need. As they say - money doesn't buy you happiness, although an extreme lack of it doesn't help much either! The happiest family I ever met were struggling to bring up 3 children on one teacher's salary, they used to live in a small house with an old car, the kids didn't have many toys and all their clothes were hand-me-downs or from cheap shops. At the weekends because of the lack of cash they would go off to the park and run round, play ball games and spend lots of time together. Because they couldn't have lots of things the kids were the least spoilt I have ever come across and absolutely great! When I think of them I wish my hubby had my job (as more stable one)....think then I would just give up work, take DT out of nursery, sell a car and have a simpler life. Don't think I'll persuade the hubby to do the same somehow!

Friday 17 October 2008

Tachycardia

I have just been to the gym for the first time in nearly 2 years and I feel bloody brilliant now!

I used to go a couple of times a week until rapidly expanding pregnant belly put a stop to that. Then the small child put a stop to gym attendance through absolute exhaustion on my part and being just a wee bit busy. I did go to baby yoga a few times, not what you'd call taxing....and also walked around with the pram a bit, usually to somewhere with cake and coffee. Unlike every other mother, I actually gained weight a few weeks after having DT. Then I got packed off to work 40 miles away and in addition to the fact that I have never been that keen on sport/exercise, there was no way I was going to go on getting home 12 hours later having not seen my son all day. Did attempt the Davina vids a couple of times but have a rather small lounge so nearly took out light fittings swinging my arms around and kept crashing into the furniture and terrifying the cat!!!!

Now with starting a local job - I have NO excuse to improve my fitness. Signed up to semi-trendy gym with good NHS discount and have resolved to go at least twice a week (that'll become once by Christmas, mark my words). Completely aware that I looked like a sack of potatoes on the machines but I stayed and I now feel MUCH MUCH better in myself!
Always telling my patients that exercise helps mood (it affects your Serotonin levels blah, blah) and do know that that is true, but I have never felt the effects of it as much as today. I feel so much more relaxed. Even looking forward to going back beacause the gym has a nice sauna bit and a coffee shop with cakes! (now, whose clever idea was that?)

I'm going again tomorrow! And I'm going to book in for a back massage 'cos they're always great. Maybe I will become a gym fanatic!!!! OK, maybe not.......but hey, it's a start!

Thursday 16 October 2008

A pain in the.....

Wow. So much has happened in the last few weeks within the O household and I have been constantly 'fire-fighting' - as they like to say in busy mental health teams nowadays. Normal service will be resumed soon. I hope.

Firstly, have moved jobs. Now not doing the commuting (which is great) but back in the situation again of being the 'new doctor'. Always a bit strange as I find mental health teams are often quite wary of you and you have to spend a fair bit of time convincing them that you're not a complete idiot and not going to act like you own the place because you have a medical degree. On that theme, once or twice in the past I have had a really great job where everyone thought I was wonderful, unfortunately not entirely on my own merits. In reality it was because the junior doctor before me had been so rude to the team that as long as I turned up on time, was friendly to them and did my job I was fantastic!
Unfortunately this time, the previous SpR was pretty nice so no easy ride on that front....

Also means that I have new consultant - he seems pretty nice although don't think I will end up having the random chats about running, cars, rugby etc that I used to have with my old consultant or get to moan to him about my awful mother-in-law. Maybe that's just as well.

The hardest bit in a new post is knowing what you are supposed to be doing. Life used to be simple in medical wards - 8.45am ward round, 10am blood taking/venflons/drug card rewriting, 11 patient reviews, etc...now I am working in an assertive outreach team. These teams deal with patients in the community who are severely mentally ill often with psychotic illnesses and have been poorly compliant with prescribed treatment and/or have engaged poorly with services. Many of the patients are socially isolated and have other health issues/drug and alcohol issues. The aim of the team is to maintain frequent contact in order to provide effective treatment and rehabiliation for this group of patients. The team is multidisciplinary - nurses, social workers, occupational therapists, psychologists and doctors. Everyone apart from the doctors and psychologist work in split shifts.

Being a doctor in the team is an odd position because you are part of the team, yet separate in many ways due to your additional commitments - outpatient clinic, inpatient ward rounds, on call etc. The rest of the staff are with the team for the entirety of their shift. I always find it hard settling in. Already I am being asked to spend large parts of my day doing visits and whilst I have no problem doing this at all,( in fact I really like it) it is hard to say "yes, that's fine but I need to be back by 2 for the ward round". I certainly don't want to appear that I'm being a bit precious!

Secondly, the father is still very very ill. Has now had kidney removed but still very poorly. A couple of weeks ago the doctors made worrying noises and hinted that they thought that he had developed a severe infection and weren't sure how he would cope with it. So we watch and wait. It may seem like I'm being cold by spending so much time talking about work and not about this. It's just much harder to talk about this and when I think about it I get upset.

I have been getting some cracking migraines this last couple of weeks and am sure that it is my way of coping/or not with Dad's illness. Twice I have ended up with severe headaches, vomiting, unable to speak or think clearly with flashing lights.....lovely. I have had these before but usually only once every few years and with clear triggers - high blood pressure in pregnancy set off the last one. Have had 3 in 10 days - lasting a LOT longer and making me feel pretty rotten for half a day after. It's the not being able to talk/understand things that scares the living daylights out of me - expressive/receptive dysphasia for those in the know.... even though I know it's a migraine, it is so scary when I can't think clearly. For how do you think if not in words?

Ah well. At least when I have a headache and DT is getting too much I can do what it says on the side of the paracetamol bottle, "take two and keep away from children"!